Monday, November 03, 2008

The Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ

I recently read an entry that I wrote in my journal when I was in my early teen years. For being so young, I had a lot of questions. I've always been an observer and thinker and so my deep entry did not surprise me at all. I wrote about my search in the understanding of life, why I was put on this world, and where I would go after wards. I wrote how I didn't understand how a God could be angry and damn someone to outer darkness because they didn't know of him. It really made no sense to me and everyone I asked had no answers and told me I shouldn't ask such questions.

Oh, but my mother knew the answers, and would explain to her best ability without breaking her promise to my father that she wouldn't interfere with our religious studies. I was intrigued with what she had to say. I wanted to know more, but didn't want to cross the line.

When we moved to the United States, all bets were off and my mom explained to us that she would be going back to church and it would be up to us if we wanted to join her. I said no thanks at first, but soon joined her. The minute I stepped in that chapel, I felt something different, a feeling I will never forget. I soon meet with the missionaries, and they had an answer to every question I had. I was fascinated. I was blessed because I knew my questions were answered. I began to KNOW the meaning of this life, that I AM a child of God, and that he loves me. He is mindful of my concerns, and wants me to be happy. He wants me to enjoy the life he gave me and wants me to strive to become the best that I could be.

Since then, I have faced some trials, but I've overcome them with the knowledge that there is hope and to never ever give up. I learned to embrace the trials because they made my life story more complex and worth it. I can guarantee, that with out the Gospel of Jesus Christ, I would indeed be a lost soul.

It has been less than 24 hours since I found out that my dear cousin (my mother's nephew) committed suicide. He struggled with alcohol and could not bear the trials he was facing. My family is facing a lot of anger and lose of hope. My aunt has yet to begin to mourn because she is just so angry. Anger that I fear that they will all struggle to overcome. I only wish that I could have shared the gospel with him more. I wish that I could have shared the good news of hope and the miracle of forgiveness.

When my brother who is serving the Lord in England found out about this tragedy, he wrote me such a beautiful email that I feel would be appropriate to share with you.

Dear Layla,
All things are done in the wisdom of him who knoweth all things. Life is short. You don't know the impact you can make on someones life. If there is anything we can learn from this is to love for the sake of love. I love you Layla. Whatever happens in life remember that i love you.
-Elder Al-Jamal


I don't know who reads my blog nor does it matter. But I want you to know this one thing, I love you. I hope that you know that when the trials get so hard and that you want to give up, please don't. Please know that there is hope and I promise you my friend that this life is worth it! If you have any suicidal thought, I'm begging you please seek help. To my dear cousin, may God be with you until we meet again and what a glorious day it will be!

5 Grass Lovers:

Diana said...

I have often thought that God is too kind to damn someone as well. Why would a parent want to subject their child to such a miserable state, especially if on earth (where we had the veil before us) we didn't understand. I don't even feel like I understand, and I worry that because of it I'll be going to a lower kingdom.

I'm sorry to hear about your cousin. You're such a good person. I really respect you.

Nancy Heiss said...

Wow, Layla! I'm so sorry to hear about your cousin. Your aunt and her family (including you) are in my prayers.

Thank you for sharing your feelings about the gospel with us!

ixoj said...

Layla, you're amazing.

nicole said...

what a beautiful post. thank you for sharing you heart with all of us.
i'm so sorry to hear about your cousin. may the peace and comfort (that only the Spirit brings), fill the aching hearts and souls of your family members.

Anonymous said...

thanks for being my daughter! You're an awesome person, but I'm prejudice!